30 Weeks Pregnant | My Maternity Shoot with Lola Melani | NYC Photographer


I am a firm believer in existing in photos, printing your photos and having your photograph taken by a professional. Even though I AM a professional photographer - and one who loves to take self portraits at that - I STILL find it really valuable to be in front of someone else’s camera from time to time. You get to capture yourself in a different way than you normally do, see yourself through someone else’s eyes, become ART … the benefits are endless really. While I love the self portraits I take, there’s nothing like having your photo taken by someone else.

While I took many self portraits during my first pregnancy, nearly no one has seen them. Truth be told I haven’t even edited many of them, and I surely don’t look at them often. So when I had the opportunity to be photographed by the incredible photographer Lola Melani, I jumped at the chance! Lola’s style is classic, elegant, fashion-y and truly sublime. I absolutely loved the experience of being in front of her lens, following her lead, giving up control (soooo hard for a control freak like myself) and let myself be pampered and directed. Lola and her team made me feel beautiful, badass, and like a goddess. And THAT is what a professional photoshoot can do for you, beyond the incredible images you will receive in the end. It’s the experience above all.

I couldn’t be happier to have these images of myself during what is likely the last time I will be pregnant. I plan on printing and framing a few and hanging them on the wall, because THAT is the best way to showcase this beautiful artwork.

So THANK YOU Lola, Vlada and Eva for capturing my pregnancy so beautifully, for the most fun day, and the experience of being photographed by one of the greats.

xoxo, Stephanie

Maternity shoots are best done between 28 and 33 weeks so plan ahead and contact me to set yours up!

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How to Make the Most of Your Boudoir Shoot | Boudoir Photography Tips | New York City

Trust me, I’ve got you.

Trust me, I’ve got you.

I have been a boudoir photographer for nearly five years now, have had several boudoir shoots of my own, in addition to all the self-portraits I’ve taken, so I know a thing or two about how you can make the most out of your own boudoir shoot. You may be thinking, “but Stephanie, can’t I just show up and have you tell me what to do?” Of course - and you can trust that you will be in the best of hands, with all the details being worked out for you. BUT with a little bit of preparation on your end, your shoot can be even more personalized which to me, equals a better experience, better photographs and more fun all around. Once you book your boudoir session I will send you a very comprehensive prep guide with tons of details about wardrobe, self-care, and inspiration. But for those of you who aren’t clients yet, here are a few tips on how you can best prepare for your shoot.

Plan ahead

I tend to over communicate with my clients because the last thing I want is for them to walk into our shoot feeling unsure about anything. Yes, I will be coaching you the entire time, but to help get to know you and your style better before the shoot I give you a homework assignment so you don’t feel like you are “winging it” on the day. (Didn’t think you’d still have homework as an adult, did you?) ;) One thing that I find particularly helpful is to create an inspiration board with images you love. Pinterest works great for something like this (and you can make a private board so no one needs to see it but you). This helps you hone in on your style visually, even if you don’t have the words to describe what you like verbally. Keep in mind that as you’re creating Pinterest boards, you aren’t trying to completely re-create a specific shot that you see. The point isn’t to bring in an image for us to replicate but instead to help you narrow your focus into a distinct vibes as the inspiration for your own shoot and styling. Here are a few of the images that I grabbed off Pinterest as inspiration for future shoots.

Brooklyn Boudoir Inspiration Board

Consider variety

One of the best ways to ensure a great shoot is to consider variety when planning your boudoir looks. Three matching bra & panty sets will not produce as dynamic a set of images as three totally different wardrobe ideas. There are lots of choices for wardrobe, and you can feel free to think outside the box. Maybe you’ll want to shoot in a cozy cardigan, then a bodysuit, then just the sheets. Or maybe your three looks would be a bra and panty set, a garter set and a badass blazer. Jeans, a bathing suit, a leather jacket, even a gown can look amazing. We can talk through the options together in your pre-shoot consultations. The point is, you can feel free to step a little outside your comfort zone, try something new and capture yourself in different looks & moods.

You can rock a swimsuit as an alternative boudoir look

You can rock a swimsuit as an alternative boudoir look

Trust your photographer

It is my passion to make women look amazing and beyond that, FEEL amazing. And it’s my superpower to make women feel comfortable, open and confident in their own skin. So ladies, TRUST ME. I’ve got you and your best interests at heart. And remember — it’s not YOUR job to know what to do, it’s mine. Once you arrive at your shoot, you’ll be pampered in the hair and makeup chair. This is your chance to RELAX and let go. Let go of those in insecurities, let go your negative thoughts, let go of control. I know that for a lot of my clients, this step can be very difficult – because, let’s face it, most of us have a little insecurity about one thing or another. But as soon as you let yourself think about those insecurities during your shoot, you give them power over you. Take back that power and tell yourself to let them go! You’ll have plenty of images to choose from, and I promise that you will love most of them. If there are one or two shots that you don’t love, that’s ok and no one ever has to see them ever again! So during the shoot, allow yourself the freedom to let go and embrace the entire experience. I promise it will be worth it.

I will coach you the entire time.

I will coach you the entire time.

Get an album. 

I can’t emphasize this enough. You might think that you only want digitals but believe me, those digital images will go to waste. They will sit on your computer and barely get looked at. It’s a totally different story seeing your images in print - so much more powerful and ever lasting. These photos are ART. YOU are art. 20 years from now you will want to look back and remember that day you kicked your insecurities to the curb and felt like your best self. Many women purchase their album as wedding or anniversary gifts (which their partners of course LOVE). But more than just a gift for him, your album is a keepsake for YOU. So feel proud, display those photos, hang them on the wall, and look at your album often. Trust me, you’ll be happy that you did.

Print your photos!

Print your photos!

Enjoy the experience. 

Sure, it can be nerve wracking, but I assure you the anticipation of your shoot will be more stressful than the reality of it. So try to relax and enjoy the experience! Channel that nervous energy into excitement, and do your best to soak in the whole experience. Listen to the music playing, look around at the studio’s environment, have a glass of champagne, chat with the HMU artist, and enjoy getting pampered!  Let yourself have fun and you will see, the most difficult part of the entire experience is making the first phone call.

Relax and have FUN!

Relax and have FUN!

Carry that confidence. 

Every so often pull out that album and remember how much fun it was to get glammed-up, feel pampered, and rock your photo shoot. At this very moment while I’m writing this blog post, I am in my PJs… my toddler is alternately sitting on my lap and playing with her toys on the floor at my feet, and I am 8+ months pregnant with baby #2. I’m definitely not feeling my most glamorous right now. BUT, I have one of my old boudoir albums sitting on the table next to my computer and I just glanced through it again. And it feels great. I remember not being sure of myself that day — I was just a few months post-partum, not sleeping through the night and not feeling like i was looking my best. But the photos tell a different story. Which just goes to show that we are always our own worst critics and that sometimes you need to see yourself through someone else’s eyes to believe that. You ARE beautiful. You ARE strong. You ARE a boss, and wife and mom and all the things that make you YOU. It’s not just about putting on false eyelashes and lingerie. It’s more than some sexy poses and pretty photos. What I walked away with, and what I want all of my clients to walk away with is a sense of satisfaction, pride and confidence in myself. 

It’s all about confidence

It’s all about confidence

So, my lovelies, as leave your boudoir shoot, I hope that you leave behind your insecurities and feelings of not being ‘enough.’ I hope that you walk away and take with you a renewed sense of confidence in knowing you are beautiful, you are gorgeous, you are enough. You are uniquely YOU, so carry that with you in your everyday life.

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to book your OWN Brooklyn Boudoir experience? Contact me and let’s chat!

Name *

Boudoir is for EVERYBODY | Client Spotlight | Brooklyn Bridal Photography


Since starting my boudoir business, I have always felt very strongly that boudoir is for EVERYBODY. One of the big myths about boudoir is that it’s only for a certain kind of women — one who maybe dresses up or flaunts their sexuality on the daily. The truth is, you needn’t be anything but yourself! Short, tall, thin, less thin, tomboy, glamorous… you deserve to have beautiful images of yourself! This is one of the reasons I don’t shoot “one size fits all” boudoir - I tailor your boudoir session to your style and preferences.

For the women who are out there THINKING about a boudoir shoot but too afraid to pull the trigger because they "want to lose a few more pounds" or whatever the reason may be...I want you to know that there is truly no time like the present. Remove "someday" from your vocabulary. You will NOT regret doing a shoot, but you WILL regret NOT doing a shoot. 

Miss "D" here thinking about booking me for quite awhile. She did her research, took her time, and planned ahead, finally using her upcoming wedding as the impetus for her shoot. She was nervous at first, just like most everyone is… and understandably so! It’s not everyday you have professional photos taken of yourself, much less in various stages of undress.

In her own words:

I had a wonderful experience with Stephanie! I was hesitant to get pictures taken because it I have always felt that my body was not boudoir subject material. However, after doing my research and looking at Stephanie's website and Instagram - I thought her pictures were so beautiful that I had to try. Although this is wedding present for my fiancé, I really wanted to capture myself in this moment of life. Which is what Stephanie is all about and also embraces. I left my photo shoot feeling like a sexual goodness!! Stephanie and her team took such good care of me. I felt calm and comfortable. She extremely encouraging during the shoot, and is constantly checking in that I am good with what is happening and how I am feeling. Looking at the pictures at the reveal, I couldn't believe that was me! I blushed the entire time, but loved what I saw. It was an amazing experience and I am so glad I did it!

A little bit of nervous is to be expected, I get it. Taking your clothes off in front of anybody is probably uncomfortable enough, but to do it in front of...a...CAMERA!?  Again...I REALLY get it!  I want women to come into this experience with more excitement than nervousness and will help you get there if you need some extra time or help getting into that zone.

Sending that first email is the hardest part. It’s a big first step, but once you take it, your nerves will be calmed and I will baby step you through EVERYTHING.  You will do great. Just like Miss "D” did.

Ready to take that first step? Contact me and let’s chat!

Name *

The Best Gift to Give Yourself | Bridal Boudoir Session | New York City Photographer


There’s one phrase you will hear me say all the time, in life, on social media and in this blog: do it for you. While a boudoir shoot makes a great gift for a loved one, it ultimately is really the best gift you can give yourself. Still, I think it’s tough for many women to come to terms with that idea, and feel they need a reason to have a boudoir shoot. Personally, I think just being a woman and loving yourself is reason enough for a shoot, but I am biased ;) It’s hard for us to justify spending money on ourselves. It’s hard to play hooky from life for a few hours and indulge in some self-care. We’re busy after all, and if you’re like me, you are always putting the needs of your loved ones in front of your own.

So it makes sense that most women look for a reason to come to be for their boudoir session. If you do want a reason for a boudoir shoot, there are several popular ones: a milestone birthday, a physical goal that’s been met, a new pregnancy, and of course, a unique and special grooms gift to gift your finance before you get married.

Ms. J came to me for this reason… at first. She was getting married in a few months and was looking for a special gift for her future groom. She has a sparkling personality and was so game to have fun and try new things. We had an incredible suite in Willimasburg that overlooked the New York City Skyline and just had the most fun afternoon taking advantage of it (hello that TUB!) We even incorporated one her fiancee’s shirts into our shoot which had been a private joke between them over the years. It was all very personal, and made for a modern twist on your traditional bridal boudoir (no veil required!)

He of course, loved the album. But the best part of meeting Ms. J was watching her come out of her shell as she discovered (as most everyone does over the course of their photoshoot) that it’s really all about YOU. Gift giving truly is, the icing on the cake.

In her own words, Ms. J said:

I went into this experience thinking this was a gift for my future husband and it ended up being the best gift I could have given myself. This was so much more than a photography session, but a way of making any woman feel so much sexier in her own skin. I was worried and self conscious about being so exposed, but Stephanie made me feel so comfortable and so empowered and it showed through the photos. Stephanie is extraordinary at what she does and has a true talent for capturing the natural beauty of a woman. I would do this 100 times over to feel as good as I did walking out of our shoot and can't wait to do it again! Thank you for giving me what I deem one of the best experiences of my 20s!

It just makes my heart sing when I hear a woman say these things. Because my relationship, ultimately, is with the woman in front of my lens. Of course, I want her future husband/wife/partner to enjoy the photos, but what I really want is for the woman I’m photographing to LOVE her images and feel absolutely amazing about them. I want her to feel like she can take on the world after her shoot, feel powerful & sexy gifting her images, and look back on her album or wall art every time she needs to be reminded how badass and beautiful she is. There is no gift better than that.

So yes, gift your boudoir images… just don’t forget YOURSELF when you are writing out your gift-list. Because loving yourself is the best gift you give yourself.

xoxo, Stephanie

Want to gift yourself something fabulous? Contact me and let’s chat!

Name *

How to Pose for Your Boudoir Shoot | Frequently Asked Questions | Brooklyn Boudoir Photographer


One of the most popular questions I get is, “What if I don’t know how to pose?” And I don’t blame my clients for asking that! Posing is probably one of the scariest parts of a boudoir session. Many people are not used to being in front of the camera and most people aren’t naturals at posing – especially without very much clothing on! But don’t worry – I never leave you to your own devices and I never expect you to know what you’re doing – that’s my job!

During your boudoir session I will be there every step of the way – encouraging you, posing you and making sure you look amazing! You will also receive some tips in my prep guide which can help. Want to do some homework ahead of time? Here are some tips for posing during your boudoir session:


First and foremost - TRUST ME!

I will pose you every time. You will never have to come up with a pose – unless you want to of course! Hey, if you’re comfortable in front of the camera and you know what poses work for you, go for it! If you’re not comfortable – don’t sweat it, most people aren’t! From the minute you walk into the shoot you will not be left to your own devices. I will pose you every step of the way! I will even put myself in the pose so you can see exactly what it is I’m looking for. A few things you’ll hear me say often are: stand up straight, tummy in, arch that back, point those feet. I’ll give you constant reminders of these things and will let you know where to look when to smile, how to breathe even! So don’t stress and trust me - I will make you look GREAT.


Practice in front of the mirror at home.

Practice makes perfect with most things, and it’s the same with posing for your boudoir session! You know what you like and don’t like about yourself so practice posing in front of a mirror at home to get the feel for what your best angles are. I personally, love my right profile better than my left profile. Most people don’t see a difference but I do, and that is what counts. Make sure you take note of what a pose feels like so you can replicate it once you can’t see yourself. Of course, I will be there to help you but practicing takes away some of the anxiety you might feel if you haven’t done boudoir before. If you have a favorite side of your face or an angle you don’t love of yourself, feel free to share it with me — I want you to love your images and I will always take those types of preferences into account.


Exaggerate a pose.

When you are in front of a camera, you can get a little “extra.” Exaggerating a pose means really popping that hip or really arching your back. Cameras love angles and curves and being a woman, you have those in abundance! Use them to your advantage and really put your whole body into a pose. I promise, you won’t look silly, to the contrary pushing your body a little more than usual will always read better in camera than a half-assed attempt (pun intended. I’ve got jokes).


Be playful and laugh.

Sure we will capture some sultry looks, but I also think a women is most beautiful when she is smiling naturally, and even laughing! So don’t be shy about having fun! Laugh, be playful – bring that inner vixen out! I have jokes that will help you laugh for real (see above for evidence of that) and will direct you to do things like jump up and down, shake it out, play with your hair, and so on that will help get your nerves out and help us capture authentic emotions in you.


Create a Pinterest board.

Pinterest is awesome to find poses that you love. Now keep in mind that we might not be able to replicate the photo exactly but we can definitely try to mimic the pose! It also gives me a good idea of the feel and types of shots you are going for. It also helps me understand your overall style and the location that might be right for our shoot.


Be prepared to be a little sore

You might be sore after your boudoir session! Seriously! Some of the poses I will put you in will feel like a pilates or yoga workout. There will be poses that are uncomfortable as you will be exaggerating and arching as I’ve said above. And there will be poses that feel funny or awkward to you – that’s normal! Feel the burn, put on a smile and I’ll show you the photo afterwards to show you how awesome you look.

What other concerns do you have about your boudoir shoot? Hit me up and I’ll be sure to blog about it — my goal is to put your mind at ease and show you that it’s all really much easier than you think it will be.

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to pose for the camera? Contact me and let’s chat!

Name *

When You're Confidant | The Power of a Boudoir Shoot | New York Boudoir Photography


We all want happiness. Even the most seemingly “put-together” women have their own narratives taking place behind the mask that challenges their livelihood. 

When I first started shooting boudoir, I didn’t quite realize the impact it could have on my clients. I loved the idea of working with women, taking beautiful portraits and creating a photography career that didn’t involve weddings or infants. But as I started photographing more women I started to realize the bigger picture in what I was doing. Upon seeing a sneak peak of their session, either on the back of the camera, from the teaser image they get the day after their shoot or at the photo reveal itself, inevitably the woman in front of the lens would say, “Wow! I didn’t know I could look like that!” And THAT is why I shoot boudoir. Because every woman should be able to look at a photo of herself and go wow, that’s really me? And feel GREAT about the fact that, YES! Yes. it. is. 


Boudoir, to me, means confidence and inner beauty. As much as it seems boudoir photography is all about outer appearances, the truth is, it really doesn’t matter what you look like. Boudoir isn’t about being the perfect size, the perfect shape – I mean, what even is that?? It’s about having confidence in yourself. When you have confidence, it oozes out of you. It touches everything you do, and it’s something you can’t fake. This is hard for a lot of people, and leads to excuses like “I’m not thin enough,” “I don’t see myself like this,” “This type of session isn’t for me.” And the personal attacks and excuses go on and on and on…

You have it in you. I know you do because I see it come out during my sessions every single time. Need help getting there? That’s ok! It’s my job to bring that confidence out of you! When you are confident, you are beautiful, stunning, fierce, unstoppable. And really, you could have clothes on and still gain the same experience out of this photo session. What you wear (or don’t wear) doesn’t matter – it’s just the icing on top. What matters is finding it in yourself to feel like you are feminine and ENOUGH.

Ms. T., whose images you see here, was one of my favorite sessions from last year. This amazing business woman almost had to reschedule because — and get this — she is a motorcycle racer amongst many other things and had a spill a week before her shoot. She was scraped up but, as she was traveling in from Texas, and that she is a super badass, we went ahead with her session as planned, working around her injuries.

You would think that being such a beautiful woman and #badassfeminist she would have all the confidence in the world. But the cover is not always the book. Like so many of us, she had her own struggles with self-acceptence, and I’m just so so happy I could be a part of her journey towards loving herself just as she is.

Ms. T said:

Just WOW. I can’t express what a gift you’ve given me. As someone that’s struggled with a lifetime of negative self talk, convinced I’m always going to be either too much or not enough, to finally exhale and have the opportunity to see myself with a fresh perspective through your lens and be proud of who and what I see…

And it goes beyond just the gorgeous images — it’s the experience you create from start to finish that’s helped me learn to celebrate myself and simply be comfortable in my own skin. Thank you for the confidence to finally own my value, my worth and to know that I am enough.

^^^^ THIS! This is the reason why I LOVE being a boudoir photographer. Women need more love and self respect in this world. Many of us feel the need to compare and judge ourselves based on other people’s “highlight reels.” We go to the grocery store and don’t share a smile with the people we pass. We don’t compliment the woman with the nice shoes or who looks like they did their hair extra nice today. Why?

Boudoir to me is extending my light and my confidence to others. I have the skills and the means to show women they are beautiful. I have the courage to give them an experience unlike any other. That’s why I became a boudoir photographer – to extend compassion instead of comparison and to show you the truth about yourself: that you are enough.


So if you’re feeling like a boudoir session ISN’T for you — be assured that each session in our studio is unique and all about you! Show a little, show a lot -- but either way, I believe that every woman deserves to see how beautiful, sexy and unique they truly are. Every body is beautiful and you should be comfortable in your own skin regardless of where you are in your journey in life.

XOXO, Stephanie

Ready to find YOUR confidence? Contact me and let’s chat!

Name *

Elise Joan | Client Spotlight | Destination Boudoir Photography


If you don't follow Elise Joan on Instagram, you must go and do so immediately. A beautiful and charismatic yogi and lifestyle coach, her feed is flooding with the most breathtaking organic images of her in practice, in stunning location around the world over along with the most thoughtful and insightful captions. Her stories share amazing lifestyle tips, incredible travel photography (most recently she’s been in Croatia), with occasional cameos by her handsome husband and adorable dog. I assure you, you'll see this feed and go researching yoga classes in your city and then make your friends take them with you. So inspiring and goals AF. 

Elise Joan has been a satellite friend of mine for nearly 20 years. I say “satalite” because there were only a few months at a time that she & I were living in the same city, and so our visits over the years have been few and far between. Even so, time and distance have barely affected our friendship — even after years of being out of touch we can chat over Skype for an hour as if no time has gone by at all. Originally from New York, Elise now lives and teaches in Los Angeles, but travels quite often. So I was thrilled when on my last trip to LA we were finally able to connect.

In a city flooded with yogis, Elise truly stands out. She’s obviously beautiful with an infectious smile and some inspiring travels under her belt. But it’s really much more than that. The magic in Elise’s teachings is that she makes yoga & healthy lifestyles choices seem easy and accessible to anyone, even the most intimidated beginner (raises hand). When you speak with her, you really believe that she’s seeing you, your challenges, what makes you tick. No stranger to life’s challenges herself, she’s honest, open and all about creating a life you are happy with — one that lets you be your best, most authentic self, to help you reach our full potential in life, not just in the yoga studio. And so, our goals for our clients (and women everywhere!) are really very similar.

When I visited her this past March, we almost didn’t get around to shooting because we spent so much time talking! I had thought we would capture her in her yoga practice, but then we realized, she’s captured herself like that so often… we wanted to capture something different. Being in her own home, we created images that feel intimate, quiet, and personal.

Elise said:

Stephanie gently guided me and directed me to bring out my own inner confidence and created a beautiful image showing he complex juxtaposition of my feminine curves and my strength. I felt comfortable, confident and feminine!

Her advise to anyone considering their own boudoir shoot?

Be yourself!! Loose your inhibitions and channel your inner goddess!! I recommend a quick grounding meditation before beginning your shoot to really get rooted in what you want to create and share!

You can find Elise’s workouts at Beach Body on Demand, and come January she will be expanding her classes to a Barre Class (which is very much up my ally, I can’t wait for it!!)

Infinite thanks to Elise for sharing her words, her home, her skills and her beauty with me and the rest of the world. I continue to be so so grateful for the amazing things my camera allows me to be a part of. 

Namaste. ;)

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to be YOUR best self? Contact me and let’s chat!

Name *

Self-Portrait Project | Brooklyn Boudoir Photographer | Behind the Scenes

An unretouched self-portrait from 2007

An unretouched self-portrait from 2007

Self-portraits, for me, have little to do with having images to share. Of course, it’s nice to bulk up the instagram arsenal and to have beautiful photos of yourself. But it’s also A LOT of work to capture a proper self-portrait. I’ve collected hundreds of self captures over the years that will likely never be seen. For me, these images are a visual diary. I can look at a self portrait I captured 5 years ago and know exactly what stage for life I was in and how I was feeling the day. Revisiting my self-portraiture allows me to see my own journey. In the beginning, it was clear I was still trying to find my style. Trying to imitate others, trying too hard to be something I wasn’t. And now that I finally know myself better, the images represent me best show my mood, my joy, my authentic self. They let me experiment with who I want to be as a boudoir photographer. And ultimately, while I do consider them “work” personally I’m so happy to have this visual record of myself over the years. So when I get preacher to my clients about existing in photos and embracing their authentic selves by not trying to be someone they aren’t … and when I preach to photographers the same importance of stepping in front of the camera (someone else or their own) I really mean it. My reason for practicing has changed over the years and the value has increased immeasurably.

Enjoy this short film a friend made of me taking and talking about the importance of self-portraiture (especially for photographers).

A Busy New York Woman's First Anniversary Gift | Client Testimonial | Brooklyn Boudoir Photographer


I often get asked if the women on the Brooklyn Boudoir instagram and blog are “real” women. Um, we are ALL “real” women, aren’t we?? But I know what they mean: the women LOOK like models, but in fact are lawyers, entrapeneaurs, business women, other photographers, moms, and in the case of Ms. D., surgeons.

Ms. D. was about to celebrate her one-year wedding anniversary and was looking for the perfect gift. The traditional gift for a 1-year anniversary is paper, so a boudoir album is an amazing and personal option. But, given her crazy on-call schedule, it was really difficult for us to find a time that worked for both of us AND would turn around her album in time for her anniversary.

So, as we women do, we made it work and Ms. D. came to me after she was on call overnight. That’s right - she had spent the night at the hospital, performing heart surgery of all things (!!) and came to me in her scrubs on about 2 hours of sleep directly afterwards. Not ideal when you want to feel sexy. Or… is it?

Before you even see a single photo, it's the EXPERIENCE that you need and deserve as a woman. The more women I meet, the more I believe that however we spend our days, we are ALL professional jugglers. Whether you are a stay-at-home-mom, a work-from home-mom, a work-out-of-the-home-mom, or a busy working woman, we are women and New Yorkers, so I can guarantee that you are juggling TONS.

It's also a safe bet that often times, of all the things you juggle, taking care to make sure that YOU are taken care of isn't one of those priorities. There just simply isn't that much time, I get it. 

As many articles as we read about making ourselves a priority so that the loved ones in our lives reap the benefits, it's downright HARD to find an hour a day to work out, it's hard to schedule a monthly girl's night with a bunch of busy women, it's hard to take 10 minutes out of your morning to stretch, it's hard to not feel guilty booking a 3 hour boudoir photo shoot experience when you know you've got others to take care of. 

But I can promise you, it's worth it. ALL OF THOSE THINGS: worth it.  Do I struggle with doing them, too? HELL.YES. But when I do, my family notices. *I* notice. I'm more productive. I'm happier. I've got a pep in my step. 

So, as we women do, Ms. D. came to me super tired and yet MADE IT WORK. She had an amazing attitude and we captured some incredible images together. Needeless to say, she needed this experience, and LOVED her images. Needless to say, her new husband did too, and I was just happy I could treat Ms. D. to some “Me time” and be a small part of their anniversary celebration.

Ms. D. Said:

Stephanie was phenomenal! She made me feel so comfortable and confident! This is the best investment you can make for yourself! Do not think about it..... just do it! I would recommend her to everyone!!!!! I can’t thank you enough for such and amazing experience.

THANK YOU, Ms. D., for bringing your A-game to our shoot — until the next time!!

xoxo, Stephanie

Have a first anniversary coming up but not sure you have time for a photoshoot? Contact me and let’s make it work!

Name *

The Similarities Between Yoga & Boudoir | Strong and Sexy Photography | New York City

Yoga & Boudoir similar? You'd be surprised!

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When to gift your bridal boudoir photos to you fiancé | New York City Bridal Trends


Bridal Boudoir has been a growing trend over the past few years.  Nearly all my brides ask the same question: WHEN should I give these photos to my groom?  This isn't always easy for me to answer since it's such a personal decision - there is no right or wrong time!  But here are four perfect times to give your fiancé your bridal boudoir photos!

  1. The night before!
    Often times the day of the wedding is filled with family, photographers, nerves… it can be a lot. The night before on the other hand offers a way to keep things extra private and to make your groom that much more excited for the big day! Also a good option so you don't have to pack it in your Mary Poppin's style wedding bag.

  2. The morning of!
    Hand it off to your MOH to deliver, but don't forget that there may be more eyes on it than you'd like. You can get around this by sending it over early before the festivities of the day begin. On the other hand, it can be SUPER fun to have your wedding photographer snap a few photos of him opening his gift - you can guarantee his reaction will be priceless! As soon as he realizes what it is, he’s sure to keep it discreet, but juuuuust in case this option is best if you’re not shy. On the other hand, you'll be hot AF and off the market so if anyone accidentally sees, who cares… but that’s just my take on it ;) If you don't want to gift them all the morning of, you could include a single 5x7 print in a card to let them know there's more to come at the end of the night. A fun surprise and something they'll look forward to all day!

  3. The wedding night!
    Give them on the wedding night. You could even drop a hint mid-wedding day to keep them guessing. This way, you know your photos are safe and sound and for their eyes only, and you can have fun looking through the album together. The downside of this option is that you’ll both likely be so tired (and probably a little tipsy) that night that it’s easy to loose steam.

  4. The honeymoon!
    If you're really patient, you could gift them during the honey moon. A perfect time for such a gift, since you’ll be relaxed and in a romantic zone. I'd personally be super antsy to share to wait that long… The other downside of course is packing it for your trip and risking it getting damaged or lost.

  5. Your one year anniversary!

    Don’t forget that it normally takes 6-8 weeks to turn an album around. Didn’t plan ahead? No worries — the traditional one year anniversary gift is paper, so an album makes the perfect first anniversary gift. You can even bring back your veil or a special piece of wedding night lingerie for nostalgia’s sake, and to get more use out of your wedding day wardrobe!


Whenever you decide to gift your boudoir album, you can’t go wrong, just be sure to plan ahead to keep the wedding day as stress free as possible!

xoxo, Stephanie

Getting married later this summer or fall? Now’s the time to get booked!

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Come As You Are | Natural Beauty Bridal Boudoir | Brooklyn Portrait Photographer


I’ve talked a lot recently about natural beauty, and not necessarily *needing a makeover before your boudoir shoot. This modern and untraditional bridal boudoir session is the perfect example of how beautifully this can work, even in a boudoir photoshoot setting.

Ms. S is a dancer amongst other things. She’s a natural beauty who doesn’t wear much, if any, makeup in her “real” life. So when she contacted me about a shoot for her soon to be husband as a wedding day gift, her one concern was looking too made up and not herself.

Ladies, this is no problem whatsoever! As I’ve said before, the most important thing to me is that you are looking and feeling like your best YOU. Not like “her” (whoever she is) but like YOU. Makeovers are fun, getting primped up is fun, and sometimes playing dress up is fun — I totally get that and am all for it. But sometimes — scratch that, MOST OF THE TIME — being yourself is the most satisfying and most beautiful you there is.

I loved how Ms. S. knew herself and her style and opted out of the hair and makeup chair. She came to her shoot completely au natural and it completely works for her casual, just-woke-up like this, cool girl vibe. I never thought Chuck Taylors could look so sexy and yet, here she is rocking them! In fact some of these images are some of my most commented on and repined from my Pinterest pages, I think because they are unique, honest and really tell a story about the woman wearing them.

And ultimately, isn’t this what we we all want? To be seen as ourselves, and have our stories heard?

In her own words, Ms. S said:

Out of any wedding related thing I've done in the last year (including looking for and buying my wedding dress) this was the absolute my favorite experience. Stephanie is super talented and a pleasure to be around. I felt like she really took the time to get a feel for who I was and catered the shoot to that. It's nice when people recognize your individuality! The final products absolutely embraced my personality and style. Also...it was just totally fun!

I will never put you in heels if you don’t own a pair of heels that make you feel good. I don’t put crazy long eyelashes on you unless you love that look. We can capture your beauty in ANY state of dress or undress as long as it’s how you feel best about yourself. Yes, I’ll direct you and I’ll even push you to the go a little bit out of your comfort zone — but only as far as you are excited to go. I have a sixth sense when it comes to women and their feelings. If you are excited to try some artistic nudes but nervous to go there I am great about capturing a few in the most comfortable and easy way. And if you want to stay in your jeans the whole time, we can absolutely make that work as well (see photos here as proof).

So if you are considering a boudoir session — for yourself or as a gift to a loved one, my advise is: don’t get caught up in what you think it “should” look like. Find a photographer who’s style you love and jives with your own, and just be yourself. So come as you are! Get glammed up or not, wear lingerie or not. Because you are truly never as beautiful as you are when you’re just being yourself.

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to express YOUR individuality with a boudoir shoot? Let’s chat!

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Let's Talk Photoshop | Brooklyn Boudoir Photographer | Frequently Asked Questions



Oh Photoshop. I love a love/hate relationship with you. Ever since the infamous Britney Spears album cover & Candies Ads (where they dramatically changed the shape of her body), it’s been a hot & touchy subject.

When it comes to photoshop, I stick to my gut (no pun intended). In general my photoshop style is very natural. So while i will make the skin look it's best, I’ll keep the "Photoshop" action minimal.  I rely on my strategic poses, lighting and angles to accentuate the positive and play down "problem" areas . I WILL edit out minor blemishes/skin flaws as well as simple things like under-eye circles and small scars if requested. My main rule of thumb is, if it’s permanent, it stays. This includes tattoos.

Many women ask about the retouching of stretch marks. While I firmly believe that your stretch marks are a part of your story and therefore are beautiful, I also understand many women’s aversion to their own. Our standard skin smoothing process will fade the appearance of stretch marks, but if you want them to be removed completely, or left 100% alone please be sure to tell me at your photo shoot. It’s all about your personal preferences.

So how does this all translate to your photos? Here are 2 examples so you can see my step-by-step Photoshopping process.

Example 1 is a self-portrait I recently took — it’s more of a beauty than a boudoir image. The crop is kind of boring so the first thing I’ll do is crop the image for a more pleasing look.


Next, I’ll zoom in to the face to remove any blemishes, bumps, stray hairs, etc. I luckily was having a pretty good skin day that day so there’s not that much to remove, but there are some red bumps, and I do have a few beauty marks that read as blemishes in photos, so I removed those too.

Before Blemish Removal

Before Blemish Removal

After blemish removal

After blemish removal

Next I’ll smooth out undereye circles and even out skin texture and tone, as well as add sharpness to the eyes. The image is definitely starting to look more polished, but not plastic-y.

After skin-evening and under-eye circle removal. I may have gone slightly overboard here for the sake of illustration (and maybe some vanity on my part) #keepingitreal.

After skin-evening and under-eye circle removal. I may have gone slightly overboard here for the sake of illustration (and maybe some vanity on my part) #keepingitreal.

Next I’ll check out the body to tweak a few things that are bugging me out. The strange bump on my wrist, for example needed to go! I also lowered the neckline of the jumpsuit a touch to add some more skin, tightened the underside of my chin a touch and plumped up my hair, particularly around the part at the top. Little things like this make the body look better without changing the shape of the body at all!

Finally I’ll add some grain, contrast and darken the background a bit so that the subject stands out even more. And there you have it! The finished product. Not super different than the original, just a bit more polished overall. The side by side at the top of this blog page shows you the 2 images next to each other.

The finished image.

The finished image.

Next, here is a boudoir self portrait so I can illustrate how I might tweak a body. Once again, the goal is to get as much as possible right in camera and not depend on photoshop. The light and then pose are key to this photo working and being flattering to the body.

The image as it came out of the camera.

The image as it came out of the camera.

There are just a few things I would tweak here: the bumps along the back from the bodysuit bunching up are bothering me, so I will smooth those out. Clients are often shocked to hear that when I do smoothing like this, or like a a tight bra strap digging into a shoulder, I actually PLUMP the skin that’s being pinched, as opposed to slim the rest of the body to meet it. I also flattened the tummy a touch, as if I was inhaling at the moment the shutter snapped, and smoothed the texture at the top of my bent leg. The final step is to convert to black and white and adjust the tones until I’m happy with the final image — blowing out the background so that the focus was on the body and not the building was one thing that was important here.

The finished product

The finished product

So there you have it! With just a few touches we keep you looking like you on your most polished, well-rested, “skinny” day. The most important thing when it comes to photoshop is that you are comfortable with the approach. Some women want to look “flawless,” others want to embrace their so-called flaws and celebrate themselves just as they are. Most women fall someplace in the middle, just like I do. I don’t want to create an illusion of perfection (perfection = boring in my eyes) but I don’t want a zit or a bunchy top to distract you from seeing your true beauty. We’ll always talk about your preferences ahead of time, which I’ll address accordingly when editing.

What are your thoughts on photoshop/facetune and similar retouching programs? I’d love to hear in the comments below.

xoxo, Stephanie

Have another question about Photoshop? I’m happy to answer it! Contact me here or send me an email and I’ll be in touch.

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Embracing Your Sexy | Brooklyn Boudoir Photographer | Client Spotlight


One story I often hear from my clients is that they often feel cute or maybe even "pretty", but hardly ever sexy. That's one of the curses of being female - we don't see our potential. We put ourselves in "cute" boxes and when someone suggests that we are sexy, we laugh it off. No way. Me? Nope. 

One of my biggest strengths is showing women how strong & sexy they are. I want them to embrace themselves as powerful and, GASP, sexual beings. It's much easier for us to grasp the concept that we are hard workers, decent moms, devoted wives. But the sexy thing is harder for us to recognize. 

But I promise, if you come in for a Brooklyn Boudoir experience, I'll show you. The shoot won't feel like you're trying too hard to be someone else. In fact, you may even think "There's NO WAY this photo is sexy!" or "There's NO WAY I'm doing this right."  The magic of it is that I'm about to show each client her sexy AF self and they don't even expect it.

Ms. C here is one such example. She came in for an anniversary gift for her husband but learned the real gift was to herself. In her own words:

Stephanie made me feel absolutely comfortable and CONFIDENT the entire day. I would recommend Stephanie to anyone! Having my hair and makeup done, being styled and taught how to pose was such a fun experience. I absolutely LOVE how my photos came out too. It's a great boost to your confidence and makes you feel sexy as hell.

I think so many people book boudoir experiences with me thinking "Well, I'm not going to look as amazing as the other women on her website, but if I can walk away with one good picture of myself I'll be happy." And those are the clients that are absolutely awestruck by the images in front of them at their photo reveal.  In fact, my favorite part of our our reveal was when Ms. C turned to me, smiling and said, “this is fuuuuun.”

Yes. Yes it is. ;)

So how do I do it? When I look at my clients — and all women, really - I see so much more than their looks. It’s true that I believe all women are beautiful, but what I also see is the story of a woman who is complicated, brave, strong and interesting, a woman who deserves to have enough confidence to unapologetically love and accept herself as she is. Just like you do. So don’t worry — I won’t force you into someone else’s definition of “sexy.” We will embrace YOUR kind of sexy.

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to see yourself the same way I see you? Let’s chat!

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Motherhood and Womanhood | Brooklyn Boudoir Photographer | NYC photographer for Women

Stella, one week old. Photo Credit: Melissa Banigan Photography

Stella, one week old. Photo Credit: Melissa Banigan Photography

Motherhood. It’s such a loaded topic, with so many complicated feelings surrounding it. With mothers day yesterday, and having just gotten back from Paris with my mother & daughter, it’s topic that’s been on my mind a lot recently.

It’s impossible to know what it means to be a mother until you actually become one. We may all be at different stages and phases at different times, but we can find common ground in these (mostly) universal experiences. Learning to love yourself after you've birthed a human is no easy feat.  Some of us hold on to 40lbs for what seems like a lifetime. Some of us bounce right back and have to deal with all the other moms side-eyeing us even though we still have mom insecurities, too.  Some of us develop crazy hormonal mental problems and can't see anything but our flaws. While being a mother can be amazing it’s so easy to get lost in the chaos of it and forget the person that we were, before we gave birth to the person we’re often holding.

There are days when you look in the mirror at yourself, nights when you look at your husband, and moments when you squeeze your child that you wonder if you have anything left to give. As women we are usually MUCH too hard on ourselves. Try not to lose sight of yourself and the things that make YOU happy. Don’t let yourself disappear. Seek balance, not perfection. Your family is happy and healthy, everyone’s hearts and bellies are full each day, and that’s all that will ever matter. Slow down and enjoy the laughter — the way you did before you had any care in the world.

Sometimes we need to look back and reconnect with who we were, our goals, our likes and dislikes, and merge that with the mother we are today.  It’s OK to be tired and it’s OK to slow down, but it’s also OK to have fun. I know that those late nights out partying have transitioned into binge-watching Netflix with your husband after finally getting homework done with your kid. There is nothing wrong with change and loving each moment the way you did before. Embrace the change and let it wash over you.

One of my favorite pictures of my mom, my little brother and myself. Says it all really.

One of my favorite pictures of my mom, my little brother and myself. Says it all really.

About half of my Brooklyn Boudoir clients are mothers, and at this point most of my friends and loved ones are mothers, so I can safely say that wherever you are in your journey: motherhood looks good on you. Motherhood works for you. You may not know it right now, but trust that it’s true. The miracle happens when you have see yourself looking incredible for the first time after having a baby. You NEED to know that you've still got it...and that motherhood hasn't stripped you of your womanhood.

Because it hasn't. 

You're still a woman. You’re still you. You're still gorgeous...sexy even.  Trust me, and when you’re ready, let me show you.

xoxo, Stephanie

Three generations in Paris last week. Photo Credit: @_ parispics _

Three generations in Paris last week. Photo Credit: @_parispics_

Ready to embrace YOUR womanhood? Let’s chat!

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Fresh-Faced Beauty | Portraits for the Modern Woman | New York City Photographer


Here at Brooklyn Boudoir, I work with a talented team of hair and makeup magicians on hand for the clients who choose to use them. However, it’s my firm belief that you don’t NEED a “makeover”. 

You’ll see I never post “before & afters” because to me that’s not what your boudoir shoot is about. You aren’t a “Before.” You are you, and my goal is to capture you looking and FEELING your best — after all, feeling good and looking good are inextricably linked. I never want to capture anything that isn’t authentically YOU.


In a world that is constantly telling us to look younger and smoother and slimmer, my clients often tell me that in their “real” lives, they don’t wear too much makeup. I certainly don’t. Many feel like they should probably go a little more glamorous for their photo shoot...because it’s a photo shoot and that’s what you’re supposed to do, right? 

Not necessarily. Even the lightest of full faces of makeup can be intimidating to someone who doesn’t wear much on a regular basis...and I want you to look like YOU for your session. Not what you think you *should look like for this experience.


For some women, that may mean a full-blown glamour transformation, and that’s cool too.  But if you’re the type to not wear a whole lot more than concealer and mascara, I encourage you to ROCK that bare face for your session. Yes, we’ll still take out any blemishes and do some gentle “zzshushing” with retouching, but your natural face is YOU, and that’s who I love to photograph and that’s what I want you to love and appreciate.

Because I love it so much, I did a model call for past clients recently and them come into a studio to be photographed fresh faced and (gasp!) DRESSED! ;) I am absolutely over-the-moon obsessed with the results.

Can you have a makeover? Of course! Having your hair and makeup done is fun and pampering, which is partly what this is about. Get your hair did, have my amazing makeup artists perfect your skin and give you a little “I just woke up like this” glow. But you don’t NEED a full-on makeover to have a boudoir shoot. I will capture your personality and your beauty regardless of what you choose to put on your face or your bod (or not put on). 

So if you have an upcoming session with me and are thinking you might want to go au natural, YOU SHOULD. With the right lighting and the right photographer (eh hem), a natural face can photograph even more beautifully than a fully made-up face.

The point is, you can absolutely wear a full face of makeup if that’s your jam….just know that you don’t need to in order to look beautiful.

I plan on hosting a past-client event later this year celebrating fresh-faced beauty, so keep an ear open and sign up for my newsletter (on the side bar of this blog) to be the first to know about it.

xoxo, Stephanie

Ready to be photographed looking good & feeling great? Let’s chat!

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The Ease of a Brooklyn Boudoir Experience | Ms. J's Bridal Boudoir Session | NYC Photographer


Ahhhh the boudoir experience… a source of mad anxiety from the time of considering the session to showing up to the studio. It doesn't matter how much I preach about how EASY it's about to be for a woman, the idea of stripping down in front of a stranger's camera is stressful...and...well...terrifying. 

Ms. J came to me all the way from Australia! She was having whirlwind week in NYC in which she arrived, had an engagement photo shoot, had a boudoir shoot AND got married underneath the Brooklyn Bridge. Whew! Her lovely fiancé set up the shoot as a gift to her — best husband to be ever (though admittedly there was *something in it for him as well).

Like so many women who come to me, Ms. J was so nervous at first. Not to mention the overwhelming week she had ahead of her… so my main goal, as always, was to make her feel entirely 100% comfortable and for this to be the easiest thing about her week in NYC.

Good thing making women feel comfortable in front of the camera happens to be my superpower. You can read it in my rave reviews, in other past blog posts and from other client testimonials, but let emphasize the ease of this experience for any of you who may be nervous about this here.

So, what's it like?? What *exactly* goes on during a session? 

First and foremost, by the time you walk through the doors, you've already received so much information from me that there really isn't anything left to wonder about. You know how long we'll be together, how many outfits we'll be photographing you in, how long hair and makeup takes, and that I'll be giving you guidance along the way. 

We go through your outfits together and I'll offer you a beverage while you're slipping into your robe. My makeup artist chats with you about how much fun you're about to have, and calms your nerves. 

When it's shoot time, I give you another run down of the process, how it's actually fun and silly and not at all a "sensual" experience. We'll be chatting along the way. I'll encourage you the whole time. I'll be mindful of your "insecurities" and play up your favorite features. I'll direct EVERY SINGLE POSE. Every limb. Your hair. Your face. All of it. All you need to do is copy me. 

Time will FLY. It ALWAYS done. If I don't make a very conscious effort to check on the time, I would shoot all day. It's fun for me, it's fun for you, and it's over before you know it. You'll already want to do it again (and probably will...they always do ;) )

About 10 minutes into the session, Ms. J, like most of my other clients, was able to relax and find her flow. We had captured some beautiful portraits of her, with NYC as the backdrop.

Ms. J agrees:

I was really nervous about the photo shoot but you made the day really relaxed, assisting with the posing made me feel much more confident!! I never thought I would do a boudoir shoot but it was totally different to what I expected and I love the finished images you created. I didn’t think I would ever be tempted to do another but after working with you I’m tempted (when we return to NYC one day ;))

2 weeks later I was able to meet her again, this time as a married woman, with her husband along for the reveal. They sat together through her photo reveal slideshow in stunned silence...when it was over, she breathed a deep breath of relief, and did a little clap.  The photos, of course, turned out incredible, and became such an amazing memory of her time in NYC.

ALL of my clients are nervous, some more than others...but they all have that self-doubt that all of my clients are models and naturally good in front of the camera and that they will be the very first person that I cannot photograph.  Yes, the women on my website look modelesque...but they are women just like you: nurses, accountants, lawyers… Very few of them are actually comfortable in front of a camera, and not many of them would describe themselves as photogenic and sexy. Yet every single one of them looks that way. 

Ladies, I’ve got you. You will laugh at how nervous you were and will most definitely want to do it again...knowing that if your photos turned out THIS good when you were terrified....they will be even better the second round when you know what to expect. 

Trust me. 

xoxo, Stephanie


Ready to bite the bullet? Let's chat!

Name *

The Big 4-0! | Thoughts on Aging | Brooklyn Boudoir Photographer


Many of you know that yesterday was my 40th birthday! I had an amazing weekend at the NYBG Evenings (the orchid show was amazing!!) and having a very civilized tea at the Plaza with my hubs and three year old. It was a classic New York weekend, which is fitting as that’s just how I think of myself: Classic NYC.

I don’t really feel 40, but then again what does that even mean? When I look around I feel basically the same age as most everyone around me. Age has never been super important or scary to me — I’ve always felt pretty balanced and “in the moment” of the age I was at the time. At 22 I started dating a man 15 years older than me. At 37, he seemed like a “Man” with a capital M. None of my friends could believe I was dating “an old guy” but I just shrugged. Age is mental, and I still believe this to be true.


While every phase of life has had it’s share of good and bad, there are some things about aging in general that remain consistently true. Here are a few things I actually love about aging:

I no longer “should” myself to death.

I come from a very conservative family with a lot of social and familial obligations. The way we “should” look or act has been a constant theme in our house growing up. And of course, there ARE certain ways you should act…(politely, with respect for others…) but back in my 20s I did things solely to please others to a fault. My mom (who is amazing) is the ultimate “should-er”: I “should” go to church, I “should” wear more makeup, I “should” put a barrette in my daughter’s hair. There were stale friends having parties that I “should” go to, even though I didn’t want to, and ended up overextending myself and exhausting myself just to save face. The thing is, I have reasons that I DON’T do these things, and I’m finally confident enough in myself and my decisions not to buckle to external pressure. And so I don’t wear more makeup, I don’t put barrettes in my kid’s hair, I only go to the parties I really WANT to go to, and I go to church as often as I feel is right for me without guilt. And it feels great.

Feeling good in my skin.

Think back to how you looked when you were 20. My guess is that you were HOT but that you didn’t think you were at the time. At 30 you probably looked back on your 20s thinking, “I WISH I appreciated how cute looked!” I sure do. I’m a solid 10 pounds heavier than I was before I had my first kid just 4 years ago! I had no idea, or at least no appreciation for how svelte I was looking, and what a shame. It’s so hard to take a step back and see yourself as you really are, so difficult to be kind to yourself sometimes, but it’s SO WORTH it. Hating on your looks is a massive waste of time (oh, and negative self-talk also ages you faster!) It would be nice to be back to that pre-mom bod, sure, but I also now know how AMAZING my body really is. I grew and birthed an incredible little girl, fed her from my body for a year, continue to support her with my body, brains, heart… and no amount of cellulite can take away my pride in that. Sometimes my daughter points to my tummy and asks something like, “is there a baby in there?” or says she likes cuddling me “because your tummy is so soft.” It doesn’t get to me, because she only ever looks at me with pure love, and I try to look at myself through those same eyes. My smile lines? There are lots of stories and happy times behind them. My forehead wrinkles? They can instruct my kid (and husband for that matter lol!) to do what I need with a mere glance. My underage circles? Well, those always existed, they are hereditary and there’s not much I can do about it so I’m not going to stress those either.

Rejecting the myth of perfection

You know that voice — the one that tells you you aren’t smart enough/successful enough/attractive enough. By 40, you know it well enough to tell it to shut the f*ck up. I’m not saying we shouldn’t strive for self-improvement. But I don’t let what I’m NOT decrease the importance of what I AM, and I certainly no longer compare myself to other people. Comparison truly is the thief of joy. NO ONE is perfect, even those people who seem to be on the surface. Pefection is not only unattainable it’s frankly in my opinion, boring. I’d much rather be my own perfectly imperfect self, not hold myself to an unattainable standard and just be happy being who & what I am right now. Imperfect works.

Perspective and resilience

I’ve been a shy child, an awkward middle schooler, a ballet-loving tween, a punk teenager, a college girl in love, an on the prowl twenty-something, a blissed out newlywed, a dual-career thirty-something, a terrified new mom, a newly forty year old woman writing this post… Life has had enough downs to know there eventually is an up, and that nothing is the end of the world. Sometimes you feel stuck or lost or heartbroken, but things always change. There is always a plan B. Hard times can feel endless, but they always always end.

I also hear sex is best for women in their 40s. Just sayin.


OK, I’ll quit being a Pollyanna for a second and say of course there are things about aging that bum me out, such as:

Being Called Ma’am

Failing to understand Snapchat

The crackling sound my knees make.

Grey hairs that poke straight up on my head. I’ve been pretty lucky in the grey hair department, and I’ve finally stopped plucking them out but still, 😑

At the end of the day, it’s better to get older than NOT to get older! I’m grateful for all the experiences, (bad boyfriends included) that have led to me being this version of me.

In the words of the late, great, David Bowie: I don’t know where I’m going from here, but I promise it won’t be boring.

xoxo, Stephanie


The Mental Equivalent of Losing 10 Pounds | Client Raves | The Brooklyn Boudoir Photoshoot Experience

Ahh, this beautiful and special woman. Where do I begin?

I have mentioned to some of you that I was recently interviewed for a documentary exploring motherhood and the workplace, an important topic that is close to my heart in it’s own right. It’s going to be a fantastic film, I’m so proud to be a part of it and I’ll keep everyone posted on it’s release, probably sometime next year. Aside from our interview, the filmmaker wanted to capture a photoshoot with me. I didn’t feel right asking a client to be filmed during our session, because your comfort and privacy is my utmost priority. But, we also wanted to capture the real vibe of a Brooklyn Boudoir shoot — as opposed to a shoot with a model — to accurately show the process and show how transformative it can be for a woman. And so, the filmmaker asked a friend of hers, who had been toying with the idea of boudoir shoot, if she would be willing to have her shoot recorded for the documentary.

So as you can imagine, this wasn’t a completely traditional shoot as there were 2 additional people in the room and TWO cameras on Ms. H. We were under time constraints but I still wanted to give Ms. H as close to the Brooklyn Boudoir experience that I could given the unusual circumstances. She handled it like a champ, and within just a few minutes, BOTH of us forgot there was a camera on us!

Turns out, Ms. H really needed this. She had recently had a few surgeries that left her feel less than her best. She was in that NYC apartment limbo with half her stuff in storage… she really needed a day to just pamper herself.

Despite the limited time frame, we shot 3 looks with some slight variations. The first was a classic Calvin Klein sporty look (with and without cozy sweater), the second a more feminine pink & black set, and hen the real piece de la resistance was her 3rd look - an amazing vintage denim jacket with nothing but her Calvins on underneath. When she walked out of the dressing room in this 3nd look… well, even the filmmaker said she could feel the confidence oozing out of her friend. It was true — she was beaming and I could tell that she was feeling like her best, most authentic self.

Now, i don't normally show clients too many sneak peaks durning the shoot — I like for there to be an element of surprise at the reveal — but I am SO TICKLED that someone was able to capture Ms. H when I showed her a quick back of the camera shot. When I say she freaked out… she actually exclaimed, “THAT’S what guys get to see when the F*CK me???” PAHAHAHAHA I died laughing a that one. It’s not about the boys, but also yes. Yes, that IS what they get to see and LUCKY THEM.

Said Ms. H. about her experience:

From your first email to me detailing what to expect in the shoot, I felt like I was in excellent hands. I felt completely comfortable, free and sexy and that is 100% due to the easy-going, professional, warm and FUN atmosphere you create. I am not usually comfortable in front of the camera but you made it easy. 

I appreciated that the shoot felt tailored to me—you were able to pick up on the particular brand of "sexy" I was going for, that felt authentic to me, and both the shoot and the photos reflect that. I felt like ME—just the best, sexiest version of me. 

I especially loved the direction you provided. It really helps take any pressure off. Then, once I was really in the moment, the spontaneity as we both came up with ideas was great too. Just all around an incredible experience. As I told my sister after the fact, "I felt so fantastic afterward, it was like the mental equivalent of losing 10 pounds." This was the best damn way to kick off 2019 and I can't wait to do it again!

Her advise for other women?

“Just trust Stephanie! She knows what she's doing and she has thought. Of. EVERYTHING. It is everything you could want out of the experience: fun, relaxing, gratifying, rejuvenating, self-connecting, and yes, so sexy. Don’t get too hung up on bringing clothing that is "traditionally" sexy, unless that's what you find sexy as well. Bring outfits that you feel good in and that fit your personality. It will show in your photos, like it did in mine.

Thank you, Ms. H . for trusting me with your photoshoot experience, for stepping outside your comfort zone with me and for bringing such amazing energy to our shoot that we could both let loose, be ourselves and capture some amazing photos of you. I also can’t wait til next time!!

xoxo, Stephanie

Need an end of winter pick me up? Send me a note and let’s chat!

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